No Nut November – Journal, Entry 4

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No Nut November – Journal, Entry 4Day 13So yeah I was playing some video games yesterday, some good old Minecraft, when I accidentally clicked my Battle.net launcher. I thought nothing of it and went on building my magnum opus on this multiplayer server. Turns out, it autostarted the Overwatch update, so voila, new content. Now the past few days, I’ve kept away from most social medias except to post stuff like this journal or maybe message a mate, because there are pictures of skimpy women EVERYWHERE, like on fucking snapchat’s news tab and shit. Maybe that’s just me though. Anyhow, I had no idea that there was a new content and shit, so I was intrigued by the new update.Well today it finished downloading. And holy fucking shit, all my horny brain could focus on was Bob’s fucking CURVES, like that robot is ROUND. I am joking of course. All I could focus on were the curves on all the other female characters. Like I forgot how fucking fit Tracer is, and Widowmaker looks so good and holy shit I got horny real fast. I queued up for a match, but as soon as I loaded in, everyone instalocked all my Overwatch waifus, or Over-waifus. I told the faggot that was Tracer that I wanted to be Tracer, but he was already Tracer, and didn’t budge. Tracer is my fucking bae so fuck this guy. So I tried Widowmaker, except some other faggot was already Widowmaker. In true internet fashion, I asked him politely to switch hero, but he told me that I was a faggot. So I played Mercy. The upside was, I could fly around and look at all the saucy angles of the girl heroes. Just as I reached into my pants, Tracer’s ass on my screen, McCree shoved his face in front of that juicy ass. I typed a rude message and moved out of the way to gaze at the prime pixelated posterior when all of a sudden, the game stopped, before my screen goes completely fucking blue. The words ‘Working on Updates. Don’t turn off your computer, this will take a while’ appears with a spinning circle underneath. Holy. Fucking. Shitballs. Windows FUCKING update. And the thing took longer to update than a fucking snail. ‘This will take a while’ my fuckin ass. Like if I told a turtle to fly to space and back, the turtle would be able to do all those things and probably travel through time before my computer finishes the fucking Windows update. A retarded duck can walk faster than this bullshit.But maybe it was an act of providence, for then the lust cleared from my mind, and I could see the errors of my ways. I yanked my hand out of my pants. Maybe it was God, who was looking out for me, out to save me from myself. Or it might’ve been Buddha, or Osiris, or Zeus or anyone. Whoever it was, I owe them my life.By the time my computer was done, Overwatch was corrupted by the sudden exit, so I had to uninstall it. Whatever the case, I was safe, for another day at least.PSA: Don’t harass other creatures, like turtles. This PSA also extends to humans.Day 14It was on a dreary night of November, that I beheld the accomplishment of my toils. I finished my Minecraft magnum opus. It was a giant pixel art portrait of Kim Kardashian blowing Ray J. It took me three days. The admins güvenilir bahis banned me. I didn’t even get to take a screenshot.Day 15I was watching “Boku no Hero Academia” tonight and it was the typical superpowered story shit that all the characters are doing. Not worth noting here. The episode finished and I cliked the ‘Next’ button. Big mistake. It was what anime enthusiasts call “The Beach Episode”. For the unenlightened, it consists of all the characters except they’re all in swimsuits this time. Think softcore hentai, but without the sex.By Talos, it was a hard struggle, with my pee-pee sticking up higher than a flag pole, as Momo breasts jiggled all over my screen. My boner rubbed against my shorts and I winced in agony from the sensation. I had to turn it off now, or I would definitely bust a nut. I tried standing up, except the area around my shorts tightened as I started to move. The pressure increased on my groin and I fell back to the ground. Fuck. I looked around. Where was the TV remote? I turned around as quickly as I could, without moving the lower half of my body. God fucking damn it. Them titties kept bouncing around on my screen as the girls made random girl noises and the boys got blood noses like in the animes.I had no idea what to do. I would be disowned if I failed this challenge. I looked around again, and spotted it. The plate of chicken tendies, except there were no chicken tendies. Just the plate and fork. I reached over for the plate. I could no fail. I stelled my resolve. I lifted my armt o throw the plate. More 2D-titties bounced. I closed my eyes, before lobbing the plate. I heard a smash, and a gasp. I opened my eyes. The plate lay shattered on the floor, the TV barely dented. The gasp came from the anime characters as Deku punched some guy. I sobbed, before bringing up the knife. Failure was not an option. I pointed the tip towards my target. I would rather die than fail NNN.I thrust forward, plunging the knife into the power socket behind me. Suddenly, the whole house went dark as electricity zapped through the metal. The TV was black. I sat there, panting for a moment, collecting my thoughts, waiting for my boner to die down. I came to the conclusion, that this is why anime was a mistake and from now on, I would be anime ~free~. I knew I would rest easy, one more day, one more obstacle down in my progress.Day 16Wait I just realized that all the characters from “Boku no Hero Academia” are u******e. I nearly wanked to an u******e teenage mutant. Except No Nut November saved my morality. Hot diggety damn guys I’m safe from the FBI charging me for pedophilia for the moment. Big FAT YEETS.Day 17Since I was anime free, I called the Three Stripes over for another round of poker with the boys. I could hear the Russian hard bass from two streets away as they came. The car screeched as it pulled up, before the door exploded with a loud “COMRADE!!!!”. The three charged in, bottles of vodka rolling through the doorframe as a horde of other people shoved their way in.Vlad drunkenly slung his arm around my shoulders. “friend,” he slurred. “Other friend Dobrevskoyevsky brought party türkçe bahis with us. Is OK, yes?”Im so fukin drunk right now. I think I snorted coke of a hookers tits, before yelling “NO THOTS ALLOWED”, pushing her out window before I broke my NNN compact. I had two bottle of vodka, before running outside, jumping the fence, and tackling a fucking hopper thing to the ground. My balls feel very sore, because I think the kangaroo kicked me in the balls and now there really sore because I was kicked. And the ‘adsadafffgSory i had to tell some ashole to fuck off, this is really really important to me and i need to type this now because its important. I want to be alone bcause Dimitri said he saw vanessa at the airport yesterday and i really miss you vanessa please come back to me why did you go to perth fucking come back i tried calling you like eight times but you never picked up the phone and i need some water im fcrying now sorry guys this is important to me and totally not storybuilding please if you know vanessa tell her to call me im going to find her now ill be back.Day 18I woke up with a hangover and felt shit the whole day. Then it dawned on me. I can’t even control my own body. Despite all of humanity’s achievements, we can’t even control the flimsy vessels that house our souls. My libido has well and truly plateaued. I have no urges to masturbate. Anime is a bore. Video games are not fun anymore. Books no longer hold their allure. Friends don’t seem interesting. I have lost all interests in everything. There is nothing to do. There is no point to anything.Life seems pointless, when you take away emotion. It drives everything we do. Take it away and we are empty shells, stuck in a hollow and futile existence.What is the point of humanity? We consume, we deplete, we go things only governed by our own emotions and desires. Take this away, and what are we as a species? The universe doesn’t care for us. We imagine ourselves as if we exist on some pinnacle, because we are alive, and because we are human, and that the whole world revolves around us, like we’re something important. But this is perhaps the greatest lie we tell ourselves every day. Because the universe doesn’t care. Nature would gladly kill us off in favor of a newer, better life form. We could try to fight it, but we barely have the wisdom to fight ourselves, with our battles and wars, let alone fight of Nature. So we are useless. There is no point to life. We have no purpose. We will wander the universe like a lonely vagrant forever, after we kill the Earth and have no true place to call home. There is only one eternal, after we die, after the universe dies. The cold embrace of the V????_o????????i??˜?¨·??d???? ??is the only constant. It lurks in the deepest reaches of space, in coldness between the stars, in the darkest oceans, cold from the lack of sunlight, the pitch black on night, which hides the true natures of humans, in the hearts of every person, from their birth to their eternal death.I don’t know how to feel right now. In fact, I feel nothing. I’m so confused. I thought writing this down would help me sort out my feelings, güvenilir bahis siteleri but I just feel more lost. Everything seems so empty. The NoFap forums said this was a more wholesome experience, but I feel as far from whole as ever. I’m going to sleep now. I might feel better afterwards.Day 19Strange things have been happening to me. This morning, I left my basement to go outside. To soak in the sunshine. I felt good for some reason, despite last night. It was like the start of the music video from The Lonely islands “Great Day”, except I’m not on cocaine. I might as well be though. Like I feel like I’ve snorted a whole two kilos of coke, like that once Scarface scene. I do feel more wholesome. The world seems brighter. I was pretty hungry, so for lunch, I went to the local Fish and Chip shop. I walked in and was assaulted by mundanity. Some tradie in an orange vest was sitting in the corner table on his phone. Behind the counter, the owner, an old man with a long, gaunt, expressionless face, maned the till, while a woman, her back turned to me, deep fried food. The smell of grease and the sound of oil popping softly filled the air. The place seemed pretty bland and grey, with square tiled walls on all fours sides bar the large glass window facing the street. Some murals depicting various sea life decorated the walls, but even they seemed faded from exposure to the sun. The man started blankly at me as I walked up to the counter, maintaining the same slightly agape mouth gape as I ordered my large chips. The woman brought out a batch of freshly fried chips, dumping them on some butcher paper. The man looked at me.“Regular or chicken salt?” he asked, sighing.I stared at him expressionlessly, imitating his ‘mouth slightly agape’ face. He started back blankly. “Both.”I snapped my fingers, and some 80’s synth song echoed through the shop’s radio. The tradie suddenly stood up, face blank, before walking over to my left, thrusting the air. The woman spun out from behind the counter looking just as dead inside, before spinning on the spot next to my right. I kept eye contact with the old man as I flailed my arms around. He just looked at me, before picking up both salt shakers, and started salting my chips. The synth song kept playing in the background. The man kept sifting the salt. I started into his eyes. The woman spun around again. More salt drifted onto the chips. The sound of the shakers rattling barely made it over the tinny music. He stared at me. I stared back, equally blank. He kept shaking the salt, emptying the whole thing onto the chips. I did a spin. The woman thrusted. The man taped the butcher paper together to hold in the chips, before placing them on the counter in front of me with a soft thud. He stared at me. The music stopped. We met each other’s gaze for a moment again. He sighed. I lifted the corners of my mouth at him, before walking out of the shops, a trail of salt flowing out of the bagged chips.The chips tasted saltier than normal. But then, the bird’s chirping seem extra melodious, the ground seems extra solid and the people seem a bit more alive. The world seems a bit more alive. I’m writing this on my phone in the middle of the park now. The flowers are fragrant, and I can smell each individual one. The grass feels soft and fluid under my feet. I think I’ll stop writing now, and enjoy the outside for a bit.

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